Thursday, June 22, 2017

#TrueFacts 23


Did you know that in 1857 five states went missing? Michconsin, North Michigan, South Ontario, Old York, and Pennsylvania's Hat all vanished one day, leaving nothing behind but the ocean they were floating on. The locals didn't want to alarm anyone, so they just pretended they'd never been there at all, and called the leftover ocean holes the Great Lakes. #TrueFact

Did you know that there is a man in Idaho that grows parsley instead of hair? #TrueFact

Did you know that a cat named Prrbld outlawed the use of vowels in Brazil? It didn't do any good, Prrbld holds no positions of authority and everyone ignored him. #TrueFact

Did you know that bagpipe dubstep is the single-most hated genre of music in the entire history of ever? In fact, it is currently illegal in almost every country except Scotland and Germany. #TrueFact

Did you know that the vacuum of space is a Dyson? It was a Kirby, but after about a million years, God got tired of lugging that heavy thing out of the closet every time, and replaced it with a far lighter, and far superior, Dyson Upright. #TrueFact

Did you know that the world has ended 6 times in the past? The most recent was the great donut apocalypse of 3400 BC. A giant bismark comet collided with a caramel pecan asteroid, just a few miles west of the moon, shooting creme filling all over the earth. The few who survived said it was the most delicious apocalypse they had ever experienced. It was way better than that time it rained fiery Brussels sprouts from the heavens in 3456. #TrueFact
P.S. Yes it is spelled with a capital B, and yes it does end with an S. It was named after the Brussels region of Belgium. Boom. You just learned something actually real from this blog post of facts that is anything but. #ActualTrueFact

Did you know that Charles Darwin's luxurious beard was not real? He lost his original facial hair in a tragic bearding accident and was forced to wear a prosthetic beard for the rest of his life. #TrueFact

Did you know that in 1991 it happened? It's true! I saw it! #TrueFact

Did you know that everyone mispronounces Babylon? It's actually pronounced Baby-Lawn. #TrueFact

Did you know that some 5 dollar bills are purple because Abraham Lincoln is holding his breath? #TrueFact

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