Obligatory disclaimer, none of this is supposed to make sense. These are all real quotes, from real conversations, or overheard in public, that just struck me as funny. They all made sense in context, but I thought they were funnier without.
“I hear a British person. And rustling."
“They love the balls of filth.”
“Mmmmmm.... Milk solids.....”
“Is your armpit hair tasty? Is it like marshmallows?
“Your nose has changed.”
“Things are pretty naturey out here.”
“I’m just gonna stand here and eat raw tortillas.”
“My innards feel fine.”
“I forgot that the Dino had sweet moves.”
“It will be a very quiet death match.”
“You could have written ‘Toad Tinkle’.”
“He’s got a fistful of pudding!”
“So you would eat the angry alpaca?”
“It’s okay if you commandeer a random napkin, it happens.”
“I’m scarred from a very unfortunate fiber supplement.”
“Beautifully coiffed in tights? I’d take it. Let’s dance, Baby.”
“A little life advice: Never eat an old nitroglycerin pill because it’s really bad for your teeth.”
“I’m always up for a new mozzarella adventure.”
“He’s touching your beans again."
“I’m just gonna squeeze this stripey thing one last time.”
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