Friday, June 12, 2015

Facebook Friends #13

It has been over a year since I last did one of these! It was last February! You can tell this one was  started back then because there's a Lego Movie reference. It is high time for another! This post is mostly the same format as the others, just slightly different, there's one new character, Rick Troll, who's purpose I'm sure you've already guessed. I also have one very experimental post in here, you'll know what it is when you get to it, Facebook does not behave like this in real life. :p Anyway, here it is, the long-awaited 13th installment of Facebook Friends!

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Ima Bean is at Circus of the Sun
Izzy Illiterate i herd thay where in town! hav fin1
Ima Bean This is the best movie I ever watched! It like totally 3D!
Lorenzo Literate You're at the circus. It's not a movie. It's real.
Ima Bean It's SO 3D! These graphics are amazeballz!
Lorenzo Literate You're hopeless.

Winston Q. Eyeglasses
The BuildaBlox Movie is the best movie in the ever!
Rick Troll If I was still in school, you would be having swirly sauce on wedgie pie for dessert right about now.
Winston Q. Eyeglasses Yeah, right. Because nerds are weak and defenseless right? Say that to my mace you basement dwelling loser!
Rick Troll What is that, some kind of medieval MMORPGYXWVUT thing?
Winston Q. Eyeglasses No, my mom bought me a can of mace when Chad Punchingfist kept stealing my lunch money. Now he has to wear an eyepatch.
Actually he just has amblyopia, but I like to pretend it was my mace.
Rick Troll Wow. That's really just kinda sad.
Winston Q. Eyeglasses I know...

T. M. Info
Cool! I just discovered that if you yank out a nose hair, it totally sets off a sneeze attack! I'm off to collect a ton of Gesundheits at Nanna Nora's knitting circle!
Mrs. Info Oh, good grief.

Roxy Repost
When I was a kid, we played on rickety playground equipment, rode our bikes without helmets, played sports without pads, jumped out of trees into gravel mounds, ran barefoot through the broken glass fields, shot each other in the face with pellet guns, and ate lead paint chips with wild abandon! And we had a WAY better childhood than these soft, coddled nightmares of today! Repost if you the best childhood ever!
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Connie Conspiracy
Did you know that melancholic shots give you cancer? Do your research sheeple! Wake up! Do NOT vaccinate your kids! YOU ARE KILLING THEM!!!!!!!!!1 Check out for more info!!!! The research is there!!!!!!!! Educate yourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Mrs. Info As someone who HAS done the research I can say without a doubt that though most in the professional field agree on the research, there are still a lot of questions, and they are asking them. Vaccines are safe for most of the population. There's no way to know who they might negatively affect. Don't attack good parents for doing what they think is right for their own kids.
Connie Conspiracy Do NOT question me!!!! I have studied the websites for YEARS I KNOW WHAT I am TALKING ABOUT1!!!!!!!!!!
Mrs. Info You believe everything you read online? The internet is literally the worst thing for anyone's paranoia. You really need to talk to some professionals about your concerns.
Lorenzo Literate Oh my word, she broke Facebook.
Rick Troll So, what are your thoughts on O'Malley?

Flower Child
Love is the music the heart sings when it perfectly aligns with another being of the eternal cosmos.
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Crazy Uncle
Ah! That smells like relief!
Aunty Uncle Craig!!!
TM Info Ba Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gloom Lyrical
"We live in ruined cities, you'll never see in movies. We struggle to survive, to survive." - Duchesse
Gloom Lyrical So deep.
Joy Lyrical What are you talking about? We live in a cul-de-sac in the suburbs. Your biggest worry is whether or not the Goth Topic has run out of spiked leather arm cuffs.
Gloom Lyrical No one understands me.

I was just folding laundry, and I realized that I'd lost a sock.

Mamma Frazzled
I just came into the living room and found the baby trapped in a blanket with one leg sticking out, swinging from the ceiling fan like a snared animal in a net.
Mamma Frazzled Well, no surprise here, it was Junior. He says he set a baby trap and baited it with a pile of arrowroot cookies.
Grammie Happy My little sweetie is a budding genius! I just know he's going to be a world famous engineer someday!
Crazy Uncle Or a big game hunter.
Auntie Uncle Craig!

Ima Bean is in a Relationship
Izzy Illiterate wooowooowww!!! yayy ima!! wutz he lik?
Ima Bean He's so dreamy! 
BB Tween You go girl! Who's the lucky guy?
Ima Bean You don't know him. His name is Haunke. He's foreign.
BB Tween Post a pic!
Ima Bean Sure. BRB.

Gladys Grizzle
So I was at Nora's Knitting Circle this afternoon, and some young punk, who wasn't even knitting, kept on picken' his wretched little nose and sneezing all over the place! It was just obscene! Nora and everybody else were all like, "Oh, bless you." Oh, Gesundheit," "Oh, God bless you!" I just went to town on him with my knitting basket. I don't think he'll be trying that again.
Gladys Grizzle That was no allergy attack. Nasty little vermin.
Crazy Uncle
If you eat four eggs for breakfast, you can get three meals out of a dozen, and if you eat three eggs, you get four meals. BUT if you go down to TWO eggs, you get SIX meals! That's CRAZY! Where did the extra meal come from!? It's like there's some kind of wicked sorcery at work here!!!
Lorenzo Literate It's called math.
Izzy Iliterate yas!!!!1 matth is evvil!!!

R.W. Republicrazy
Last night Donald Reagan came to me in a dream. The vision was so powerful I just started weeping profusely. It has been so long since a perfect, flawless human being has been in office. I just know this was a sign from God.
G. O. Pachyderm Ah, yes. I do miss The Dipper.
Rabid Liberal I thought you Republicans were against worshiping humans. Looks like somebody needs to read their Bible.
R.W. Republicrazy Oh yeah? Well at least I don't worship SATAN!!!!!!!! Like YOU!!!!!!!
Rabid Liberal I don't even BELIEVE in Satan!!!!!! What's wrong with you?!?!
R.W. Republicrazy WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!?!??!?!?!

Hannah Hashtag
So excited about the new royal baby!!!! #RoyalBaby #PrinceRoland #PrincessKayte #PrinceHogarth #PrincessCarlotta #QueenEliza #Adorbs #DiaperDiaperDiaper
Joyful Exclamations Oh, I know! Isn't new life grand!?
R.W. Republicrazy This is why this freakin' country is going to  photo Censored.png in a handbasket!!! NO TRUE GODFEARING AMERICAN PATRIOT SHOULD CARE ONE SINGLE  photo Censored.png ABOUT THE FREAKING ROYAL FAMILY!!!!!!!!!1
Rainbow Sunshine I agree, Hannah and Joyful. It's so amazing. R.W. I'll pray for you. I hope you find happiness someday.
R.W. Republicrazy The only happiness I need is freedom! FREEDOM!!!!!

I was just buttering my toast, and I got butter on my hand. LOL!

Mitch Morebuff
Yes! I just totally pounded Walter Wimperson in the Punchfighting match! I rock, so hard!
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Ima Bean
My gorgeous BoyToy, Haunke.

Lorenzo Literate I don't even have words. No words at all.
Izzy Illiterate im so happey 4 u!!!
BB Tween ... Ok ...

T. M. Info
I was just innocently minding my own business at the knitting circle this afternoon, trying to get some tips, when out of nowhere some crazy old bat just attacks me with her knitting basket! And she keeps her yarn in an ammunition chest! I think she fractured my humerus!
Gladys Grizzle Well, I find that humorous!
T. M. Info You! It was you, wasn't it! You're just the kind of old crone who would attack someone with an ammunition chest!
Gladys Grizzle You'd better believe it! Now stay away from our knitting circle you cesspool of disease!
T. M. Info Fine! Sheesh! I was just trying to get some blessings!
Gladys Grizzle Then go to church you little delinquent!

Joyful Exclamations Today is the day the lord hath made! Let us rejoice and be glad in it!
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Joyful Exclamations Thanks Rainbow!

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